Just a Girl

Let me tell you a little story about a girl.  A girl that wanted to be the school mascot but never had the courage to try out.   A girl that wanted to be the pretty one…or the skinny one…or the popular one.  A girl that has always been the funny one.  A girl that says the F word more than she should.  A girl that enjoys cheesy movies.  A girl that rocks out to Miley Cyrus.  A girl that wanted to be a hip hop dancer.   Um…are you done laughing yet?  This girl COULD  be a hip hop dancer.  Rude.   Moving on…A girl that never knew she was capable of the amount of love she has for her husband and daughter.  A girl that loves food.  A girl that would eat more salads if the lettuce was deep fried.  A girl that has been hurt.  A girl that has hurt others.  A girl that enjoys hearing about other people’s drama because it makes her feel normal.  A girl that can drop it like it’s hot.  A girl that struggles with “picking it back up again”.   A girl that has seen every Friends episode one bajillion times.  A girl that wanted to name her daughter Chandler.  A girl that dances in front of the mirror.  A girl that poses for pictures with her hands on her hips to make her arms look smaller.  A girl that snorts when she laughs.  A girl that laughs at her own jokes before telling them.  A girl that most times has no filter.  A girl that quits most everything she starts.  A girl that loves playing charades.  A girl that will slit her wrists with a plastic knife if she sees anymore political shit on Facebook.  A girl that dreams about food.  A girl that is very addicted to Pinterest.  A girl that hates shaving.  A girl that loves Fall because she doesn’t have to shave as much.   A girl that secretly loves when the skinny, popular girl from high school gets fat.  A girl that read Fifty Shades of Gray (the trilogy) in less than a week.  A girl that hasn’t read that much since the 80’s.  A girl that cries while watching Biggest Loser.  A girl that hates admitting when she cries.  A girl that once got drunk and went down a slip n slide in her t-shirt and underwear in front of work colleagues and her new boyfriend.  A girl that married that new boyfriend 5 months later.  A girl that learned a long time ago that if you laugh loud enough at yourself, you can’t hear anyone else laughing at you.   A girl that sings rap songs in an opera voice.   A girl that has a flat stomach…..when lying on her back.   A girl that WILL bring sexy back.  A girl that hopes she can inspire.  A girl that now despises the word “girl” because she has used it one bajillion times (yes, it’s a number).  A girl that lost 4.8 pounds this week. 

THAT’S RIGHT MUTHA FUGGGGERS!  Fluffy lost 4.8  effing pounds!!!!  After I got done doing a pelvic thrust and a fist pump, I did this…

“The Bytch” aka scale is my new best friend.  I ‘m seriously thinking about strapping her in the Baby Bjorn and taking her ass to the mall to show her off!!!!  In case you need a visual of that….

I am still in shock that I had such an awesome first week and it wasn’t nearly as hard as I thought it would be.  I don’t want to say “I watched what I ate”.  I hate that saying.  I don’t know about you but I watch every morsel of food before it goes in my mouth, it doesn’t matter if it’s an apple or a slice  an entire apple pie.  This saying is just plain stupid.  Anyways, I was much more aware of what I was eating and actually measured out my foods to ensure I was eating proper portions. 

This blog has been such motivation for me because it’s what holds me accountable.  I went to a birthday party this past weekend and turned down cake.  Who does that?!?!?!?! Everyone knows that the best cakes are 1. Birthday cake and 2.  Wedding cake.  Knowing that I could have the satisfaction of telling you that I turned it down made it worth saying NO. 

That’s right bytches, Fluffy is 4.8 pounds closer to being a Hommy! (Hot Mommy). 

I’m just a girl and this is my story,

Fluffy in Frisco