Thursday, May 30, 2013

A Star is Born

It felt like the night before the first day of school.  I couldn't sleep a wink.  As I tossed and turned, I wondered what I would wear for what was sure to be the biggest day of my life.  Did I pack everything I needed?  I mean......the only things I didn't pack were the sofa and recliner but those just wouldn't fit in my bag.

We checked in to the hospital before 8am.  There was some issue with paperwork so we would have to wait until my doctor got out of another surgery before they could start the pitocin.  Those hours were filled with mindless tv for me and working from his laptop for Mr. Fluff.  I was so glad that Mr. Fluff got lost in his work.  I didn't want to talk.  I didn't want to entertain.  I just wanted to BE.  I wanted to soak in my last moments of being "Fluffy" before my world forever changed and I became "Fluffette's Mom".  It could be minutes...or hours before I would meet the alien that's been kicking me in my lady junk for the past few months.

At 11 am, they started the Pitocin.  I was dilated to 2cm.  Within minutes I started feeling the contractions that had flooded the computer screen all morning long.  By 11:30, I needed pain medication.  They kept telling me that I could get my epidural at any time but I wanted to hold out as long as I could.  I knew that I would be "in labor" for hours and wanted to make damn sure that there was plenty of "epidural" in me when the time came to push out a toddler from my lady hole.  At some point, they decided to insert some device inside my junk to better watch my contractions.  If anyone EVER requests to insert something in your ladyjunk....other than male junk.....JUST.SAY.NO.  It hurt like a mutha fugga.  Immediately following, they broke my water.  It felt like a constant stream of goo was coming out for what seemed like days.

At this point, the contractions were stronger and unbearable.  I applaud any woman that can do this without drugs.  However, I'm fully aware that Fluffette will be a huge pain in my arse for the rest of my life.  So, if there's a time that it's acceptable for me to take drugs to get through something.....count me in.  They said I would feel just a few more contractions after I received my epidural.  I felt NONE.  The next couple of hours were a major blur.  I was beyond high on life.  Every time they came to check me, they flipped me to the other side.  I'm assuming that was just to make sure my bed sores were evenly distributed.  

At 1:45, they said I was fully dilated.  We did a practice push...whatever the hell that is.  At 2pm it was game on.  I FELT NOTHING.   No pressure.  Nothing.  They said push and I did what I hoped was 'pushing'.  I pushed for hours and hours and hours.

Just kidding....I pushed for 35 minutes.

On May 29, 2012 at 2:35 pm, Violet Hayes Austin was born.  She weighed 8.1 pounds and was 20.5 inches long.

The past year has been absolutely effing crazy.  Good days, bad days.  Blood, sweat, tears, more tears, laughter, snorting, Friends marathons, more tears, insanity and happiness.

Fluffette, you make me want to drink and you test my patience on an hourly basis but your level of awesomeness amazes me daily.  We are so lucky to be the ones to eff you up so much that years and years of therapy won't even break the surface of your issues your parents!  We love you so much and can't wait until you turn 18 so you can move out and we can start drinking heavily again to see what the future holds for you!

Happy belated Birthday, Boogie!  (yes, you have 153 with it)

I recently ran in to one of the baby nurses from the child safety course we took before Fluffette was born.  She asked how my labor went and I told her.  She said, "WOW!  That's quick, especially for your first time. I wouldn't tell anyone that story"

And.....since I don't like it when people try to boss me......I shared my story anyways!  


In the name of childbirth and blown out vag's....I'd like to welcome baby BoBo!!!  (I received permission to share this picture with you and was specifically asked NOT to call him BoBo.  That's so cute that Hippy thinks I listen to her.  :)

He was born on 5/21.  BoBo and Fluffette's love story is just beginning.  They don't know it yet but they're getting married someday.  We don't care if they love each other.  Not everything can be about them.  Hippy in Hutto and Fluffy in Frisco WILL be in-laws someday.  End.of.story.

Pin It

No comments:

Post a Comment