Cleaning:
We’ve had a
maid for a few years and I decided this week that I would let them go and clean
myself. If you don’t have a maid you
just rolled your eyes and said “boo-effing-hoo”. However, if you DO have a maid you just shook
your fists towards the ceiling and shouted “whyyyyyyyyyyy”. Maids are one of THE BEST things ever
invented and I pretty much immediately regretted my decision. However, the truth of the matter is that we
spend $180(including tip) a month on their service and I can find plenty of other
things to spend that money on since I’m not working (i.e. mani’s, pedi’s,
Fluffette’s 1st Birthday and BoBo’s baby shower).
A girl in my
photography class last week told me about an awesome app and I wanted to share
it with you. It’s called ‘Motivated Moms’ and they have a free
version. It gives you a daily list of
things to do around the house to make it more bearable. For instance, today I cleaned out the fridge
and washed the shelves, vacuumed around the fridge( didn’t know you were
supposed to do that) and mopped the
kitchen. I pretty much hate ALL of these
things but it feels so good once it’s done (twss). It also doesn’t hurt that it’s a great
workout! Go check out this awesome app….or
don’t…whatever….I don’t care if your house is messy.
Cooking:
Last week, I
decided to give Mashed Cauliflower a whirl.
It was fairly easy to make……not so easy to eat. I plopped some on Mr. Fluff’s plate and handed
it to him with no intention of telling him that it’s not potatoes. He took a giant bite, looked at me and said “ummm…..what’s
this white stuff”. I said, “is it good?”
(knowing the answer). He more loudly
said, “WHAT IS IT?!?!!?”. I told him
what it was….and that blob of “fauxtatoes” stayed on his plate. Needless to say, if you’re looking for a
healthy alternative for mashed potatoes, just eat asparagus.
“That’s not even remotely the same thing as
mashed potatoes”
Egggggggggsactly
my point!! Neither is mashed
cauliflower. (insert dramatic gagging
face here)
I also
attempted to make this
breakfast pizza…..twice. After my first
epic fail left me angry and needing to clean the egg off the bottom of my oven,
I decided that I would NOT be defeated by a damn breakfast pizza. I won’t bore you with all the details because…well…..it
still makes me angry. I will just say
that the current score is Breakfast Pizza – 2, Fluffy – 0.
I’ve pretty
much been Betty Crocker (before she learned how to cook) the past week. I made this
Tastes Like Lasagna Soup and I was pleasantly
surprised. It was absolutely delicious
and I will definitely be making this again.
I think most of the flavor comes from the sausage but if you aren’t a
sausage lover (lesbian), then I think ground beef or turkey would work great
too. Seriously…..try it. If I didn’t eff it up, neither will you!
Control:
As you know
from my post from earlier this week (post being called Fluff’s racy-ist post
yet), I ate a lot of crappy food this weekend.
In addition to girls night eats, I had Cane’s fried chicken, Mexican food
and Whataburger. The old Fluffy would’ve
continued on this path for at least a week then cried about her pants not
fitting well anymore. Well, I’d like to
introduce you to the new “Ima get back on it ASAP” Fluffy….
I’m not
saying that Sports Illustrated is going to call me soon to be on the cover of
this year’s Swimsuit Edition. I’m just
sayin……”I’d hit that”. There’s only a 20
pound difference in my body, but I will tell you that my mind is lighter than
it’s ever been. I’m pretty sure I just
called myself an airhead…and sometimes I am.
What I’m trying to say is that I used to cheat then I would cheat more
to make myself feel better….or worse….about the cheating I’d already done. Then I would dwell on it for days and drive
myself crazy. Now, I eat the queso and
then Monday begins and I’m back to watching what I eat and working out. I am fully aware that my cheating is slowing
down my weight loss since I’ve been at a plateau for about three weeks now, but
I also know that when I try to give up all the bad-for-you food, I end up
binging and gaining 45 pounds in one day. (slight exaggeration)
I’m soooo
close to the 170s that I can taste it.
(mmmmm…tastes like chicken). My
goal is to break in to the 170s by February 1st. If I can achieve that I will send you all
a copy of 30 Day Shred I will give you all a virtual high five. Fingers crossed!!
Confession:
I wish that
I had something cool to confess like… I’m transgender or a stripper on the
weekends or I like to eat a roll of toilet paper a day (I saw that on tv…wtf). Unfortunately, my confession isn’t that
cool.
Here it goes…..I’m
a smoker (deep breath…well…deep breath for, you know, a smoker). I smoked prior to my pregnancy and thought it
would be the hardest thing for me to give up when I got prego. Luckily, it was actually pretty darn easy for
me. I mean…I took the occasional drag
(like 4 or 5 in that 9 months). Gasp….she took a drag while pregnant?!?!??!
I sure did…and
Fluffette turned out JUST FINE…
Anyways, I
didn’t plan on smoking after I had her, for obvious reasons but then
breastfeeding happened and it rocked my world.
Everybody tells you that you’re a bad mother/person if you don’t
breastfeed, but NOBODY tells you how effing hard and stressful it can be. I didn’t produce enough milk and I considered
cutting off my cracked and bleeding nip-oleans (I despise the word nipple) on
several occasions. Finally, Mr. Fluff
begged me to go smoke a cigarette and take a break before I was featured on an
episode of Snapped. The rest is history. I smoke every day, with my favorite smoke of
the day being right after I workout.
I’m assuming
that several of you would like to lecture me right now on how awful it is to
smoke, especially as a mother. If you are able to say ‘true’ to all of the
following statements, I will gladly listen to your lecture:
1.
I have
zero debt and have never managed my money poorly.
2.
I’ve never had even an ounce of alcohol and have
definitely never made an arse of myself whilst drinking.
3.
My spouse, children and I are all in top
physical shape. We never make poor food
choices and we workout daily.
4.
I have a perfect relationship with my significant
other. We always communicate
effectively.
I could go
on and on, but I would guess that you answered ‘false’ to at least one, if not
all, of those statements. The point is we
ALL have something about our lives that we’d like to change. I’m just choosing to share this with you to
hold myself accountable. I’ve been
focusing on eating right and working out and now I want to work on quitting
smoking.
By the way,
if you were able to answer ‘true’ to all the above items, please send your
lecture to:
That is all,
Fluffy in
Frisco
